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Light Yourself on Fire

by The Deconstruction

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1.
Jet Pack 05:57
2.
Luxury 05:43
3.
4.
Plea Bargain 07:48
5.
6.
7.
Foundation 05:45
8.
9.

about

THE DECONSTRUCTION - LIGHT YOURSELF ON FIRE

1 JET PACK
We can sleep in peace, but we wake in pieces. We can never be satisfied.
Always wanting what we can’t be.
I want to live this cartoon image of the action hero that isn’t me.
We want to have this catalog of values and vivid sitcom schemes.
My mind and body provide the framework for this building of Styrofoam.
Melted down by negativity and the corrosion of longevity.
Designed to fail, destined to fail. Riding the tracks to obscurity.
My astronaut hopes were shattered in fourth grade mathematics.
I will never be able to fly. I think at this point I’ll lay down and die.
We are done evolving. Let’s operate. Cut my larynx out.
Crawl back into the water and sink like a brick. Sunk like a ship. We stink like shit.
My astronaut hopes were shattered in fourth grade mathematics.
I will never be able to fly. I think at this point I’ll just lay down and die.

2 LUXURY
Clutching onto everything that molds me.
Living with this complacency.
Dwelling on every step backward.
If I hold on, it will bury me.
And in falling, failing and running into solitude.
If I could piece it together with all my faith in you.
Assembly, delivery and luxury.
Keep in mind, every breath’s a luxury.
The tired man tells the tale of living life alone.
On the road and being robbed of everything he ever had.
His one love, and their love and the son he doesn’t know.
He takes another slug, rolls out of our lives and back into his own.
I guess I’m not the only one who wants to be alone.
Assembly, delivery and luxury.
Every beat of every pulse works toward the end result.
Once decided, it can never be retrieved from destiny.
All we have is who we are. What we’ll be is not enough to save me from me.
Assembly, delivery and luxury.

3 BALANCING ACT
This is the swan song. This is where I don’t belong.
I can avoid your eyes, but my conscious never dies.
We avoid the conflicting words, on the wire like a hundred birds.
On the wire like a hundred thousand birds.
This bird is stifled.
A one hundred bird salute. When the shots begin to shoot.
And the flock takes flight as the sun burns into night.
The wire resonates a hum, but the these words will never come.
Unsettled by these honest words. Pecked out eyes from the Hitchcock birds.
All it’s going to take is for one us to break.
This bird is stifled.

4 PLEA BARGAIN
Reduced to terms of verbal warfare.
Talked round and round and down.
So petty.
Why does it drag me down?
On trial. So trivial. So minimal.
Hold these feelings beneath the surface and let them drown.
Let me down.
I’ll forgive you. You didn’t do anything.
It’s all mine and me.
Spewed forth, the vivid image of anticipation.
I am not forgiven, I am not excused.
Please ignore me. Accuser. Guilty.
It’s all mine and me.
Taken out of context and talked into the ground.
The perfect moment. The broken circle.
Defeated silence. This is here and now.
I am not forgiven. I am not excused.
Please ignore me.
It’s all mine and me.

5 ONE BIG HAPPY
In the winter of your discontent,
you packed your suitcase with a kiss goodbye.
Seems you forgot to put your boy away.
You made a promise and took it with you.
Smothered out your duties and led the night astray.
When you drove off, you should have locked your boy away.
With your absence, you left an empty shell that remains empty.
Made a promise and took it with you.
Smothered out your duties and led the night astray.
This family has no value.
This family has no substance.
This family was our family.
It ceased to function. There is no reason.
The severed junction. This bitter season.
You resigned your position and you pinched my soul.
You brought the house down with your performance.
The consolation. I still resent you. I still hold onto you.
This family has no value.
This family has no substance.
This family was our family.
The repercussions of your decisions.
The words ring and ring.

6 CIRCUS MUSIC FOR INVALIDS
I’m your guardian angel. Come fly with me.
I’m your fairy godmother. Come die with me.
Invest in time and we’ll fly.
Christened as immortal.
Re-programed for infinity.
Never come to terms.
The truth is not so pretty.
Synthetic seeds for a perfect lie.
99 octane to burn your city down.
The happy home collapses from within.
Your burning aspirin stomach will never heal again.

7 FOUNDATION
Broken down and sucked down.
By your manipulation.
This is reluctance and rebellion
This is my interpretation.
Force fed a lifetime of societal barbed wire.
Bled dry from generations
Of parental confirmation
Inbred values that will dictate our Resistance to be shallow
In the drivers seat, with a gun to my head
Clutching the textbook that I’ve never read
At arms length, hold the baby, kiss the baby
Whisper “Daddy loves you”
And nail, nail the coffin shut
At arms length, hold the baby, kiss the baby
Whisper “Mommy loves you”
And nail, nail the coffin shut
A locked down mindset
Injected at birth
Tunnel-vision carries out tradition
Spoon-fed pride and prejudice
Break the mold, rebuild the foundation
And accept your worth
Accept your worth
Your upbringing is your downfall
At arms length, hold the baby, kiss the baby
Whisper “We love you”
And nail the coffin shut

8 WITH ENGLISH SUBTITLES
Too far in to back out now, I’m stuck here
I looked in, looked out, now I’m locked out
Screwed down by an over-active driver
Weaseled in, weeded out
A demographic survivor
Mob-force contriver
This is my attempt to get through and pull through
And for you to get to know
A post-nasal bloomer
With a long-term investment
And no returns to show
I’ve been told where I should be
And I know where they can go
5’ 11”, six-feet from heaven, what the hell do I know?
A shaky pedestal, for a tired forum
Another weak attempt to broaden the spectrum
It goes and comes, returns the favor
Hard to swallow, unpleasant flavor
A conglomerate mess and as a criminal,
I must confess, I helped to seal the envelope
Paper-cut tongue, lethargic wrecking ball
Steam rolling dream roller,
I want it all

9 La Crosse, WISCONSIN
Number one brings me up
Number two brings me down
Part three turns me on
The other kills me
The monster is fueled
It’s bearing down and I’m breaking down
Slave to my mind and I can’t get away
How can I face it? I can’t avoid it.
I’ll never befriend it if I’m trying to fight it.
The group effort failed
And I can’t stand here alone.
It clings to me and clouds my eyes
I can see the aftermath, because I see it, I live it every day

- Scott Towne Kalamzoo Michigan 1995

credits

released November 8, 2019

Scott Towne - Vocals
Sean Barney - Guitars
Alan Bainbridge - Bass
Josh Wilson - Drums
recorded live to 2" tape by Todd A Carter "Cecil"
Western Sound Studio
Kalamazoo Michigan 1995
Late Issue Records
LIR-0002

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Todd Carter Chicago, Illinois

releases by Todd A Carter

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